My vreugdes en frustrasies

A - Z (2018)

#AtoZchallenge (2018) O is for feeling Obstinate

My theme for this challenge is “feelings” of a sexagenarian and the influence of social media.

My tema vir hierdie uitdaging is “gevoelens” van ‘n sestig-plusser en die invloed van sosiale media.

English (Afrikaans below):

Obstinate: stubbornly refusing to change one’s opinion or chosen course of action, despite attempts to persuade one to do so. Does this definition remind you of someone? A very young child perhaps, or a very old person? Yes, in both cases, and having lived long enough to have experienced both the former and the latter stages in life, my opinion on this can be trusted.

One simply does not argue with a three-year-old who refuses to eat boiled cabbage. The same is true with regard to a very old human being. The first is basing her argument on the premise of personal taste and the second is raising the defense of gaseous emissions detrimental to her physical and spiritual well-being. Both are valid arguments in respect of basic human rights which cannot be denied. Thus, no boiled cabbage.

I remember growing up in a small community. Life was so simple. Choices were straight-forward and once made, became a way of life; no-one ever changed their mind about anything. Ever. One either drove a Ford or a Chevrolet, drank Pepsi-Cola or Coca-Cola, smoked Lucky Strike or Lexington cigarettes, spoke English or Afrikaans, voted for the one and only leftwing or the one and only rightwing party, attended church on a Sunday morning or went dancing on a Saturday night. One or the other. No middle ground. No further discussion.

The role of social media:  Then came social media and life became complicated. There are so many choices, so very many opinions, no privacy, and everyone is sticking their nose into everyone else’s private business. No longer are we permitted to resist change on the grounds of “this is how we live” or “this is how it was always done before”. Nope, everything is dragged into the open, discussed, rejected and something else introduced into its place. “Change your mind, or we will change it for you” is the new way of life. Exciting, isn’t it? Today’s emoji: 😣

Afrikaans:

Koppig: hardnekkig weier om van mening of ingeslane weg te verander, ten spyte van pogings om jou tot ander insigte oor te haal. Laat hierdie definisie jou aan iemand dink? ‘n Baie jong kind miskien, of ‘n baie ou mens? Ja, in beide gevalle, en ek het reeds lank genoeg geleef om beide die vroeëre en latere stadiums te ervaar, dus kan my mening in hierdie verband vertrou word.

‘n Mens argumenteer eenvoudig nie met ‘n driejarige wat weier om gekookte kool te eet nie. Dieselfde geld vir ‘n baie ou mens. Eersgenoemde beroep haar op die beginsel van persoonlike smaakvoorkeur en laasgenoemde grond haar  verdediging op die vrystelling van gasse wat haar fisiese en geestelike welsyn kan benadeel. Albei is geldige argumente ten opsigte van basiese menseregte wat nie ontken kan word nie. Dus, geen gekookte kool nie.

Ek onthou die grootwordjare in ‘n klein gemeenskap; die lewe was so eenvoudig. Keuses was eenvoudig en as die besluit eers geneem was, het dit ‘n lewenswyse geword. Niemand het ooit van plan verander nie. Ooit. ‘n Mens het òf met ‘n Ford òf ‘n Chevrolet gery, Pepsi-Cola of Coca-Cola gedrink, Lucky Strike- of Lexington-sigarette gerook, Engels of Afrikaans gepraat, vir die enigste bestaande linkse party of die enigste regse party gestem, op Sondae kerk toe gegaan of gaan dans op ‘n Saterdagaand. Een of die ander. Geen middelgrond nie. Klaar gepraat.

Die rol van sosiale media: Toe kom sosiale media en die lewe word meer ingewikkeld. Daar is soveel keuses, so baie menings, geen privaatheid nie, en almal steek hul neus in ander se private besigheid. Ons word nie meer toegelaat om verandering teen te staan op grond van “dit is hoe ons leef” of “ons het dit nog altyd so gedoen” nie. Nee, alles word in die publiek oopgevlek, bespreek, verwerp en iets anders in die plek daarvan gestel. “Verander van gedagte, of ons sal dit vir jou verander” is die nuwe manier van lewe. Opwindend, is dit nie?

Die rol van sosiale media:  Emoji vir vandag: 😣

Read all my entries for the #AtoZchallenge (April 2018) here.

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37 Comments

  1. Ja, jong, Hester: “May you live in interesting times…”

  2. Your description of growing up in a small community made me smile at my own experiences: add to that, you either liked Elvis Presley or Cliff Richard and both sides would laugh at those who dared to admit being a fan of Pat Boone! People were comfortable with limited choices that made life easier. Today, thank goodness, girls can broaden their career horizons instead of choosing to work in a bank / post office, become a nurse / teacher / hairdresser!

    • Comment by post author

      HesterLeyNel

      Elvis and Cliff, yes. Elvis is still king, of course. I also happened to like Pat Boone! Yes, you know, about careers, I also started out in the bank, found my niche right there and stayed with them until retirement ages. I guess I was one of the lucky ones, because the bank paid for my studies (back then it was still a privilege). But it is quite true that we were unaware of the variety of choices that we could have made earlier in our young lives.

  3. Of die Beatles of die Rolling Stones.

    • Comment by post author

      HesterLeyNel

      Die Beatles natuurlik! ‘n ander blogger het nou-net die stryd tussen Elvis en Cliff ook genoem. Haha, my dogter het nog so ‘n geslag teruggegaan en sit heeldag en luister na die destydse “crooners” – (Frank Sinatra, Dean Martin, etc.). Sy reken dis die beste musiek ooit.

      • Ol’ Blue Eyes gee my ‘n pyn waar ek hom nie wil he nie! New York New York is vir my pure marteling. Goeie lekker sorgvrye dae.

  4. Veral nie kleurlose, doodgekookte kool nie. Maar kool wat net effens gekook is met kaas en room en Aromat daaroor, mag jy beide die obstinate oorhaal om dit te eet!

    • Comment by post author

      HesterLeyNel

      Ek is baie lief vir kool, maar beslis nie met kaas, room of Aromat nie. Defintief nie Aromat nie. Ons sny dit fyn en braai dit vinnig in botter met ‘n kippie sout en rasper neutmuskaat oor of andersins hou ek van my cabbage stew. Ek is ‘n brediekind.

      • Ja Aromat is gif. Ek wpnder of Ina Paarman se veggie spice nie beter is nie.
        Botter en neut werk ook goed saam met die meeste groentes.

        • Comment by post author

          HesterLeyNel

          Ek is nie baie lief vir klaargemengde speserye nie en selfs vir ons kerriegeregte meng ons self die speserye. (Control freak – ek wil weet wat is in my kos). Ek hel meer oor na die gebruik van kruie in my kos. Saam met die kool sou ek byvoorbeeld fyngekapte pietersiele, tiemie of grasuie (of ‘n kombinasie) gebruik. Varsgemaalde peperkorrels vir die heerlike geur.

        • Klink heerlik

      • Ek is ook lief vir bredie.

      • En nou is die bredie-seisoen op hande.Kerrie en sjerrie.

  5. Daar is net te veel stemme wat vandag se dae praat. Dit kom van oral af en maak dat ek my kop in ‘n gat wil druk. Al hierdie menings maak my koppig. Die ou dae was eenvoudiger….het wel gerebbeleer teen almal in dieselfde boksie…maar die lewe was rustiger. Kerriekool is ons ding. En Elvis is nogsteeds tops 😊

    • Comment by post author

      HesterLeyNel

      Ek het nog nooit kool gekerrie nie. Interessant – ‘n groente met ‘n sterk smaak saam met kerrie.

      • Met die spul kinders en net een inkomste moes ek planne maak om mae vol te kry met so min as moontlik. Kool alleen wou die kinders nie eet nie… toe “invent” ek maar kerriekool en siedaar eet almal ‘n bordvol sonder klagtes. Ken is tot vandag toe gaande daaroor…. ek dink dit is maar sy liefde vir kerrie wat praat.

  6. !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Super, dear Hester! I’m especially impressed with your definition of social media …I dislike so much 🙂

    • Comment by post author

      HesterLeyNel

      Thank you, Maria. But social media is not all bad – it has it good points as well.

      • Partially I agree, but I’m so old & conservative regarding the Internet! Oh, gosh! Skype is the most advanced messenger for me yet 🙂 Blogging, though, is another field. I believe it is our personal tribute in Internet civilization.

  7. Ek is ook maar lekker skuldig

  8. Ek het nou die vooreg om ‘n driejarige en ‘n oumens tegelyk te kan beleef en jy slaan die spyker op sy kop Hester.

    • Comment by post author

      HesterLeyNel

      Sjoe ja, ek ken daardie situasie. Met my ma en my drie kinders almal in die huis (en ‘n man daarby), het dit soms bars gegaan.

      • Genade! Sjoe, my ouma is darem in die ouetehuis. Ek kan dink hoe dit vir jou moes wees. 🙈

  9. Goeie ou dae met min keuses…maar nouja, mens kan nie agterbly nie!

  10. We must be open. Take it all. It was nice to read over the experiences. Social media, I understand.