My vreugdes en frustrasies

A - Z (2018)

#AtoZchallenge (2018) T is for feeling Tired

My theme for this challenge is “feelings” of a sexagenarian and the influence of social media.

My tema vir hierdie uitdaging is “gevoelens” van ‘n sestig-plusser en die invloed van sosiale media.

English (Afrikaans below):

Tired: not so much as “in need of sleep or rest”, but rather “bored with/by, sick of, sick and tired of”. Can you still remember those days when you woke up and jumped out of bed, excited about life, eager to start the new day? I can. I feel like that most days. I am retired, you see?

I experienced similar feelings as a very young child; each day was a new adventure. I was always the first one up in the morning, dressed and ready to devour my breakfast long before the rest of the household came awake. I always hurried to get ready for school, or over weekends, to get out of the house and play with my friends.

Then all that changed. I started to get tired, as in “bored, sick and tired”. This did not happen overnight, no, the changes sort of crept up on me. First of all, there were those stormy hormonal changes to endure during my teenage years, then came the responsibilities of being an adult, an employee at a huge company, a wife and mother on top of changing political environment, menopause and the ailments of an aging body. All this eventually led to the loss of my joy the vivre. I felt stifled, bored with life, sick and tired of dragging my already exhausted body off to work and at the end of the day back home to watch the depressing news on television and to read the same depressing news in the newspapers. Next morning, same old, same old until one day that I realised nothing has changed since yesterday, yesteryear or the previous century in fact.

Then finally, I grew so tired that I decided to go on early retirement and there was no reason to get up in the morning. I had nothing to do. My life was more or less over. So I started wondering what on earth I was supposed to do with the rest of my time on this earth and I went to look for advice in my favorite library, Dr. Google. I also started talking to other retirees on my favorite discussion circles on … you got that right … social media.

The role of social media:  Surprise! I remember the senior citizens of the previous generations sitting around in the sun, knee-blankets folded around, well, their knees, sometimes reading a book or more often just staring into space. Today’s 60/70/80-plussers are touring the world, working out in the gym, falling in and out of love, studying for degrees, running marathons, having a ball. I decided to embrace the New World Order of Happy Retirees and to rediscover the joy and the excitement of that long ago childhood, which is exactly what I did. I woke up. Today’s emoji: 😴

Afrikaans:

Moeg: nie juis soos “in slaap of rus nodig nie”, maar eerder “verveeld met / deur, siek van, siek en moeg van”. Kan jy nog daardie dae onthou toe jy wakker geword het en uit die bed gespring het, opgewonde oor die lewe, gretig om die nuwe dag te begin? Ek kan. Ek voel baie dae so. Ek het afgetree, jy sien?

Ek het soortgelyke gevoelens as ‘n baie jong kind ervaar; elke dag was ‘n nuwe avontuur. Ek was altyd die eerste een wat opgestaan het in die oggend, geklee en gereed om my ontbyt te verslind lank voordat die res van die huishouding wakker geword het. Ek het altyd gejaag om gereed te wees vir skool, of oor naweke, om uit die huis te gaan en saam met my vriende te speel.

Toe het alles verander. Ek het moeg geword, soos in “verveeld, siek en moeg”. Dit het nie oornag gebeur nie, nee, die veranderinge het my bekruip. Eers was daar die stormagtige hormonale veranderinge gedurende my tienerjare, daarna het die verantwoordelikhede gekom om ‘n volwassene, ‘n werknemer by ‘n groot maatskappy, ‘n vrou en ma te wees; dis nog bo en behalwe die veranderende politieke omgewing, menopouse en die kwale van ‘n verouderende liggaam. Al hierdie dinge het uiteindelik tot die verlies van my lewensvreugde gelei. Ek het gevoel dat ek verveeld was met die lewe, ek was moeg daarvan om my reeds uitgeputte lyf werk toe te sleep, en aan die einde van die dag weer huis toe net om die teneerdrukkende nuus op televisie te kyk en dieselfde teneerdrukkende nuus in die koerante te lees. Die volgende oggend gebeur alles weer van voor af. Toe, eendag, het ek besef dat niks verander het sedert gister, die vorige jare of selfs vorige eeu nie.

Uiteindelik het ek so moeg geword dat ek besluit het om met vroeë pensioen te gaan en daar was geen rede om die oggend op te staan nie. Ek het niks gehad om te doen nie. Ek het begin wonder wat op aarde ek met die res van my tyd op hierdie aarde moes doen en ek het raad gevra by my gunsteling biblioteek, dr. Google. Ek het ook met ander afgetredenes begin praat in my gunsteling geselskapskringe op … jy het reg geraai … sosiale media.

Die rol van sosiale media: Verrassing! Ek onthou die senior burgers van die vorige geslagte wat in die son gesit het, knie-kombersies, wel, oor hulle knieë, soms besig om ‘n boek te lees of meer dikwels, net in die verte te staar. Vandag se 60/70/80-plussers toer rondom die wêreld, oefen in die gimnasium, raak verlief en maak uit, studeer vir grade, hardloop marathons, geniet die lewe. Ek het besluit om by die Nuwe Wêreldorde van Gelukkige Afgetredenes aan te sluit en om die vreugde en opwinding van lang jare terug se kinderdae te herontdek, en dit is presies wat ek gedoen het. Ek het ontwaak. Emoji vir vandag: 😴

Read all my entries for the #AtoZchallenge (April 2018) here.

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35 Comments

  1. There is such a big difference between the 60/70 even 80 and today 2018. You can hardly compare them. The best of today is that your body can age but your brain stays up to date as long as you keep using dr Google and the internet.

  2. Again, you have hit the nail on the head: retirement is what we make of it – embracing the physical slowing down and the inevitable health issues. I agree with scrapydo2 in that we needs to keep our brains on their toes by finding things of interest and being interested in our surroundings.

  3. Oòooooo ek het weer gelewe deur al daardie jare…. gevoel ek het ‘n doel op hierdie aarde. Menieres het my rêgtig op hok kom sit… en hier help sosiale media baie…. maar ek mis daardie ek lewe my roeping uit.

    • Comment by post author

      HesterLeyNel

      Weet jy, tot 2001 het ek heerlik gewerk, hoewel ek baie hard gewerk en terselfdertyd studeer het. Werk was ‘n moerse plesier eintlik, maar my persoonlike omstandighede was ‘n nagmerrie, veral toe ek boonop gediagnoseer is met kanker. So van 2008 af het werk ‘n kruis geword as gevolg van werksomstandighede wat ek nie hier wil ophaal nie. Dit, gekoppel aan die feit dat ek ook nog my ma versorg het, was later net te veel vir my. Ek het letterlik gevlug van my daaglikse bestaan af.

      • Daardie donker vallei waardeur mense gaan (wat vir jare kan aanhou) en wat buitestaanders niks van weet nie. Ek en my dogter het gister daaroor gepraat. Ek is bly jy het jou vreugde teruggevind Hester, en dat jy jou lewe nou so geniet…. as die weer net altyd wil saamspeel.

  4. Dis nou so lekker positief! In plaas van om te wag vir die dood en om te dooi van verveling na aftrede, het die wêreld regtig vir ons oopgegaan op sosiale media.As mens se oë dit hou, het jy vir lank nog ‘n poort na buite, al is jy dalk afgerem deur siekte en ouderdom.

    • Comment by post author

      HesterLeyNel

      Dit is so. My man is as gevolg van sy gesondheid baie ingeperk op sosiale gebied (en boonop is nie ek of Karen juis sosiale vlinders nie). Hy sou baie eensaam geword het sonder sy vriende se geselskap op sosiale media.

  5. Yes, there is no excuse for boredom in retirement. There is so much one can do
    to stay engaged in life. And now work doesn’t get in the way of my hobbies!

  6. Donna B. McNicol [@dbmcnicol]

    Looking back at my grandmothers, they both were highly active in the community (small town) well into their late 80’s & 90’s. You see less of this today because of our mobility. Not as many people live in their hometowns and small towns are becoming fewer and fewer.

    I semi-retired at 50, moving into the part-time working world. My spare time was spent motorcycling, Delphi forums (early social media), writing web content and reading. I was never bored.

    By 60 I was widowed and had spent the previous two years adjusting to that as well as riding my motorcycle solo around the US (covered 42 states, 27,000 miles). So my next move was to sell everything (except the motorcycle), buy a small motorhome and become a full-timer, living and traveling in the motorhome.

    By 62 I was remarried, still living full-time but in a much larger RV, still motorcycling (he also road) and seeing my country even more. We started cruising, seeing both the Panama Canal and Alaska, rode all of Rt 66 (a historic US highway that goes from Chicago, Illinois to Santa Monica, California) and got to turn age 66 while doing that, then we moved to Ecuador to live for two years. When we came back, we spent a lot of the next year cruising again, mostly the Caribbean.

    Age 70 now, and I stay busy riding on the back of hubby’s motorcycle (finally sold mine at age 68), enjoying our two Goldendoodle puppies, cruising, reading and writing mystery novels.

    Tired? Not the bored kind…LOL!

    Donna B McNicol, author & traveler
    Romance & Mystery…writing my life
    A-Z Flash Fiction Tales: http://dbmcnicol.blogspot.com
    A-Z of Goldendoodles: http://ourprimeyears.blogspot.com

    • Comment by post author

      HesterLeyNel

      Well done. This is what makes this new generation of retirees unique, we are not afraid to dare and to live a full life.

  7. Ek ken ook daai moeg… ek noem dit gatvolmoeg!

  8. I admire your energy – I’m only just heading towards 40s and I’m tired and ready to jump off the world and just have a long rest! 🙂
    https://iainkellywriting.com/2018/04/23/t-is-for-talinn-estonia/

  9. I love this Hester! There’s so much to think about.

  10. Thanks! I’m rather glad you woke up because you keep us entertained while you’re at living life!!
    More of us should take your advice and WAKE UP!!
    😉 🙂 😛 🙂 😉

  11. Tired is now at various levels. Well put piece of writing. 🙂

  12. Nilanjana Bose

    Thought provoking and well articulated. I know both happy and engaged retirees and tired retirees. No guesses who the family/friends flock to for advice and company.

  13. With each passing decade, it seems like those in their 60s/70s/80s are getting younger and able to do more than they did in the 1970s and before. My daughters and I volunteer at a nursing home and some of the residents are in their 100s and still very bright and active. It’s amazing!

    • Comment by post author

      HesterLeyNel

      I know that to be true; I regularly visited my mom in the old age home until she passed away at the age of 96. I was always surprised by the elderly residents participating in games, playing musical instruments, tapping away on their laptops – it really is amazing. Thank you for visiting my blog and commenting. I see that you chose hobbies for your theme. I’ll be dropping by to see what you are up to.

  14. Is it gatvol without the annoyance? Haha! I have experienced being sick and tired, even of being sick and tired, or just of being sick (last year). I’m glad I’m over it. I’m not tired yet. 😊 I just dread aging (as you may remember). 😀